I just woke up from my 2 hrs nap and it is this weird dream that i had, that somehow woke me up.. Feeling really very tired these few days.. Problably it is because that i am still recovering from the terrible accident that i met less than a month ago.. Well, it all happened on that fateful day, 24th Aug, Mon... I was basically helping out in the Matriculation Fair which is supposed to be held a week after that fateful day. For the whole of the holiday, i spent all my time working in an eletronic manufacturing company called Semina SCI as a data entry personel and a week in CAC Camp which i had a truely enjoyable experience as i met a bunch of really nice pple. I mean, back on that very fateful day, i decided to stop working, leaving all my commitments behind and planned to spend all my time and effort on this MF project. And it is on that very fateful day, i got squashed by 13 partition boards on top of a lorry. It happened at the gantry outside engin and wat i heard is that the whole accident, abt 1 and a half min, was capture by the survilliance camara. Pretty much a scary accident to think of it now..
ok i just came back from clementi.. Went out to buy milk, cerals, shoe spray (my sandels smells bad after the rain yesterday..), alcohol swap for my stitch, a bottle of 1.5 l of green tea, 2 packets of seaweed (the one that yihan says is nice), thirsty hippo for myself, multiplug and electric mosquito repellant for yun. The stuffs were super heavy and i got to carry it back alone.. i also had dinner there before i came back but think the chicken rich that i ate is not filling at all as i am feeling hungry now. haha.. think i will be needing supper later..
back to the story.. Basically, my right fifth rib from the top was broken and it punctured my lung. my lung was then leaking and as the air escapes into my chest, it compresses my lungs and causes mi to have difficulty in breathing since my lung cannot expand. What the doctor did was to insert a chest tube, abt 15 cm, into my chest (think the diameter is abt 8 mm). The worst thing is that i had this insertion twice. The first time they inserted and took out, my lungs collasped again as it does not sticks back to my chest wall. (just in case u didnt know, ur lungs and chest are supposed to stick together..) In the end they got to insert the 2nd tube again and connect it to a suction machine. The pain was so much to endure that max pain killers and jabs does not ease it.. I felt so demoralised then and how i wish to just pull out the chest tube and end my life.. when the pain had finally subsided, the side effects of the medication and the numerous X-rays that i took(X rays on everyday..) have caused me to feel like vomitting, giddy and nauseous.. Stayed in hospital for 16 days and got discharged the on 8th aug (the day before national day..)
this was actually the first time i see death so close in my eyes.. the incident was so tramatising that it unknowingly makes mi think wat if my head had taken the damage..? Then i might have a broken skull, and wat if it pierced into my brain..? will i lose all my memories..? will i become crippled or paralysed..? worst still.. will i become a vegetable...? I would rather be dead then to sleep alive...
well i would say that it is really very fortunate of me to be here tell the story. I remembered my friend once told mi "at least you live to tell the tale, and not all have this 2nd chance." This incident has really taught mi a lot of things.. It makes mi realise that i am not alone in this world and that there are so many pple who are so concern abt me.. thoughout the stay in hospital, there are so so many pple who came, some came twice, some trice, and some come so many times that i lost count.. ( this could be due to the Xrays that i had everyday as it kills so many of my brain cells...) The MF pple was with my mum when i was in A&E, my whole OG from CAC camp cancelled their outing to sentosa to come and visit mi, my jc classmates, jc schoolmates, my secondary sch friends, band friends from jc and sec sch, army friends, uni friends, friends from CBLC, friends from kr hall, NUSSU Exco, friends from BP mentoring, collegues and supervisors of Semina, staffs from OSA and ECE and there is this person who called mi from australia as he is doing his SEP there.. and even all those who msg mi and tell mi that they cant come, i truly feel all ur sincerity, care and concern. there are so many pple... Thanks for being with me all this while. All this makes me realised that there are so many friends of mine that i have not been keeping in contact.. and there are also friends whom i had forgotton.. really dissapointed in myself... hopefully, i will have a chance to met up with them and thank them personnally of which some i don even have their hp nos... so guilty...
this is such a long post and i think i can go on and on if i want.. the moral of the story is that this is my second chance in life, it is like a totally new beginning for when i stepped into sch this semester... pple whom i don expect them to know anything started asking me if i am feeling better or if i need help walking around sch and so on.. really very touch to see so many pple who cares so much for mi..
u never know when will u be leaving this world so live everyday as if it is the last day of ur life. Friends are always there for u. they will come to u when u least expected it so reach out to them first when u still have the chance... all of them might be busy with their own life but u are always in their hearts... i will keep all of u in my heart as well..
ok i just came back from clementi.. Went out to buy milk, cerals, shoe spray (my sandels smells bad after the rain yesterday..), alcohol swap for my stitch, a bottle of 1.5 l of green tea, 2 packets of seaweed (the one that yihan says is nice), thirsty hippo for myself, multiplug and electric mosquito repellant for yun. The stuffs were super heavy and i got to carry it back alone.. i also had dinner there before i came back but think the chicken rich that i ate is not filling at all as i am feeling hungry now. haha.. think i will be needing supper later..
back to the story.. Basically, my right fifth rib from the top was broken and it punctured my lung. my lung was then leaking and as the air escapes into my chest, it compresses my lungs and causes mi to have difficulty in breathing since my lung cannot expand. What the doctor did was to insert a chest tube, abt 15 cm, into my chest (think the diameter is abt 8 mm). The worst thing is that i had this insertion twice. The first time they inserted and took out, my lungs collasped again as it does not sticks back to my chest wall. (just in case u didnt know, ur lungs and chest are supposed to stick together..) In the end they got to insert the 2nd tube again and connect it to a suction machine. The pain was so much to endure that max pain killers and jabs does not ease it.. I felt so demoralised then and how i wish to just pull out the chest tube and end my life.. when the pain had finally subsided, the side effects of the medication and the numerous X-rays that i took(X rays on everyday..) have caused me to feel like vomitting, giddy and nauseous.. Stayed in hospital for 16 days and got discharged the on 8th aug (the day before national day..)
this was actually the first time i see death so close in my eyes.. the incident was so tramatising that it unknowingly makes mi think wat if my head had taken the damage..? Then i might have a broken skull, and wat if it pierced into my brain..? will i lose all my memories..? will i become crippled or paralysed..? worst still.. will i become a vegetable...? I would rather be dead then to sleep alive...
well i would say that it is really very fortunate of me to be here tell the story. I remembered my friend once told mi "at least you live to tell the tale, and not all have this 2nd chance." This incident has really taught mi a lot of things.. It makes mi realise that i am not alone in this world and that there are so many pple who are so concern abt me.. thoughout the stay in hospital, there are so so many pple who came, some came twice, some trice, and some come so many times that i lost count.. ( this could be due to the Xrays that i had everyday as it kills so many of my brain cells...) The MF pple was with my mum when i was in A&E, my whole OG from CAC camp cancelled their outing to sentosa to come and visit mi, my jc classmates, jc schoolmates, my secondary sch friends, band friends from jc and sec sch, army friends, uni friends, friends from CBLC, friends from kr hall, NUSSU Exco, friends from BP mentoring, collegues and supervisors of Semina, staffs from OSA and ECE and there is this person who called mi from australia as he is doing his SEP there.. and even all those who msg mi and tell mi that they cant come, i truly feel all ur sincerity, care and concern. there are so many pple... Thanks for being with me all this while. All this makes me realised that there are so many friends of mine that i have not been keeping in contact.. and there are also friends whom i had forgotton.. really dissapointed in myself... hopefully, i will have a chance to met up with them and thank them personnally of which some i don even have their hp nos... so guilty...
this is such a long post and i think i can go on and on if i want.. the moral of the story is that this is my second chance in life, it is like a totally new beginning for when i stepped into sch this semester... pple whom i don expect them to know anything started asking me if i am feeling better or if i need help walking around sch and so on.. really very touch to see so many pple who cares so much for mi..
u never know when will u be leaving this world so live everyday as if it is the last day of ur life. Friends are always there for u. they will come to u when u least expected it so reach out to them first when u still have the chance... all of them might be busy with their own life but u are always in their hearts... i will keep all of u in my heart as well..
